Tuesday, October 23, 2012

The Power Wry NCAA 2012 Week 8 Rankings

The Power Rye, or Power Wry, depending on my mood and state of sobriety, is the most accurate ranking of college football available.  Each week, I feed all of the facts, figures, stats, scores and a pint of rye whiskey into the Power Rye ranking matrix.  Two days later, I pinch off a post.

3 Magic references in a row?

  1. Florida (7-0) Defeated South Carolina 44-11.  Florida has the most impressive resume, but beating South Carolina is starting to get less impressive.
  2. Oregon (7-0) Defeated Arizona State 43-21.  Halftime score 43-0.  They took a self-imposed second half ban in order to score points with the committee for infractions.
  3. Alabama (4-0)  Defeated Tennessee 44-13.  
  4. Kansas State (6-0) Defeated WVU 55-14.  And for a change, somebody watched it.  Just not for long, because it was a grade A ass-kicking.
  5. Ohio State (7-0) Defeated Purdue 29-22.  Urban pulls another victory out of his magic murder bag.  (Currently watching an old Venture brothers rerun.)
  6. Oregon State (5-0) Defeated Utah 21-7.  Whooped BYU last week.  I'm thinking that those magic underwear are overrated..
  7. Our Lady de Just About Right defeated BYU 17-14.  Yep, magic undies, overrated.
  8. Oklahoma (5-1) Defeated Kansas 52-7.  A nation prays that they end the Our Lady of Please Go Away nightmare this week.
  9. Mississippi State (7-0) Defeated Middle Tennessee St 45-3.  Congratulations.  Next week, you get crushed by Alabama.
  10. Clemson (6-1) Defeated Virginia Tech 38-17.  I'm thinking about saving the 10 spot for whoever beats Va Tech each week.  5-2 NC State, you're on deck.
No Desmond Howard's were harmed in the creation of these rankings.  It was not for a lack of trying.  He's still really fast.  Free the Torg.  I also hear that Kent Graham's backup pussed out on his radio show this week.  That is hear-say because no one in Columbus listens to the Kirk Herbstreit show.

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