Thursday, August 11, 2011

Wry World of Sports Presents the Definitive Jim Tressel Time Line

Tomorrow, The Ohio State University goes before the NCAA Committee of Infractions.  There is no need to wait for the NCAA to reveal the long history of bad-bad-bad-doings of ex-Ohio State coach Jim Tressel.  Our crack staff of investigative drunks at the Wry World of Sports has already cracked the case.
  • ∞ B.C.  Tressel gives God the finger.  Creates hell..
  • Long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.  Tressel convinces Anakin Skywalker to kill some Yuenglings.
  • 6000 B.C.  Tressel bakes Eve an Apple Pie.
  • 44 B.C. Et tu Jimbo?
  • September 1st 1919.  Shoeless Joe Jackson Tells Tressel that he'd "Gladly pay him Tuesday for a hamburger today."
  • October 2cd, 1919.  Chicago Black Sox Scandel.
  • December 5th, 1952.  Jim Tressel is born.
  • October 2cd, 1963, Jimmy Tressel gets a library card in Dallas Texas.
  • November 22cd, 1963.  John F Kennedy is assasinated.
  • ... Premise starting to run thin...
  • May 30 2011, Tressel resigns as football coach at Ohio State.  Justice!

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